Debt Psychology 101
Let’s face it, nobody wants to be in debt. That’s why debt relief assistance is such a hot topic right now. So how do we get to the point of struggling with outrageous credit card debt?
Ever mounting debt can cast a huge shadow on our lives. Starting with the shame we have to learn to deal with on a daily basis, to the constant fear. Not only do we have to put up with debt collector harrassment, but many people have friends or family who look down on them for being in a debt situation. Then there’s employer background checks where strangers and potential employers have the right to scour your credit history. Hopefully you have a good support system around you, but at the very least, if you are a situation of high credit card debt, you are currently dealing with, or will soon be, debt collectors who want to make you feel like you are a bottom feeder in the chain of life. With the negative impact indebtedness has on our lives, why is debt increasing in the United States?
One might assume that the answer lies in the importance that consumers put into material things and wealth. Another answer might peg the rising greed of Western capitalism as the culprit. Many people today have become aware of the growing disparity in wages in Western Society, and realize that it’s getting more and more difficult for the common people to manage day-to-day living. While all of these elements have a part in the rising epidemic of credit card debt, none of them stretch far enough to explain why so many individuals suffer from the debilitating condition and circumstance of poverty and indebtedness while others enjoy affluence and comfort.
When you’re looking at how to eliminate credit card debt, understanding the thinking, lifestyle choices, and other elements that brought you into this situation can be an empowering tool that will help you get out of debt and stay that way for good.
Like with any thinking or behavior pattern, your childhood sets the prime foundation for how you’ll treat money later in life. Did your family freely discuss money, or did your parents treat money as a taboo topic? Were you given an allowance for work performed or was it just handed out? Dd your parents open a checking account for you and teach you how to save? If we learned early on to take responsibility for homework, test scores, assigned chores, perhaps even took on a part-time job in high school if we had the spare time, we are learning to prioritize and gaining a strong sense of responsbility and comfort in learning how to manage our financial affairs.
We may not realize it at the time, but these first financial steps resonate into our adulthood. If money was treated as a taboo topic in your household, if you didn’t learn the value of a monetary system and how to manage it, then chances are that you feel as though money is a “bad” thing, maybe even an evil thing—meaning that you don’t have a right to pursue financial success. Self reliance in this capitalistic society demands that we understand the importance of financial management, and the value of money.
Some people who weren’t exposed to responsibility early on can view credit cards as a way of getting something for nothing. However, this is such a minute fraction of those that are in credit card debt, it is hardly worth mentioning. The truth is that most people have fallen on harsh circumstances they feel they had no control over, and they’re likely right. Perhaps looking back, we can recognize that there were decisions that we made that brought us to a situation of vulnerability and lack of control, but how can we know this in advance? Hindsight as they say, is 20/20. So, sometimes poor choice-making is to blame, but that is certainly not always the case.
At the same time that we were supposed to be taught the value and importance of money, we should have also learned the value of ourselves, and as we move into adulthood, it should relate to how we value our time, and how well we are paid. That, whether we like it or not, has a lot to do with our own personal feelings of self-worth. Psychologists have long studied the strong relationship between money and self-worth within Western cultures; in fact, these psychologists argue that the more self-worth we have, the more comfortable we are with seeking a lifestyle of financial comfort.
Conversely, studies have often shown that those patients who had low self-esteem believed that money and material possession defined them; therefore, the more that they spent, the more they felt that they were looked upon as valuable members of society. You’ll recognize this by it’s more common name as “keeping up with the Joneses.” So either way you look at this, it pays you well to have a good dose of self worth and value; and if you didn’t learn it growing up, it’s a good time to learn it now!
Understanding what has brought you to a position of indebtedness can be very helpful in moving on after eliminating the credit card debt you have accumulated. Through many resources on this site, and the counsel of an experienced , knowledgeable, and compassionate counselor, you can learn how to eliminate credit card debt. Then begins the work of rebuilding your life and developing new lifestyle choices, possibly a new career, or a new path.
I really endorse doing the inside work as well as the outside work, and I heartily recommend handling your own debt situation moving forward over hiring a company to handle your debt negotiation program. It is a learning experience in itself, and so empowering yourself to manage your debt and realizing you have the skills and maturity to do so, will help to rebuild your self confidence. After all, debt isn’t something that just “happened” to us—we participated to some extent. Taking control of our finances and learning how to manage the financial aspect of our life is an important step moving forward into living a debt-free life.